Elevating Your Conversational Game to Build True Partnerships

1 min readOct 10, 2023

An advisor’s first task is to listen and communicate effectively. But do you really know how to do that?

You’ve probably heard the expression “you have two ears, but only one mouth, so you should be listening twice as much.” But that’s out-of-date thinking that leads to waiting to speak rather than active listening.

In this episode, host Matt Halloran welcomes Mary Schmid — a communication expert and consultant — to explore the art of effective communication through the lens of neuroscience. Together, they review strategies for enhancing your communication skills, which go beyond the typical advice of listening more and talking less. Mary introduces practical concepts like the “Golden Minute” for self-preparation and the “Million Dollar Opener” for setting the right tone in conversations.

Matt & Mary discuss:

  • How conversations can either trigger oxytocin or cortisol in the brain, and why you want the former but not the latter
  • Why you should focus on how you want the other person to feel during and after a conversation
  • The 1–4–9 Rule of Listening
  • The importance of asking questions for which you don’t know the answers
  • Actionable tips like the “golden minute” and “million dollar opener” to foster more meaningful and trust-building conversations